I seem continually drawn to situations that nearly kill me. Today I ran harder than I ever have before; I was literally at wit's end. There was only the forward movement. I could see, but my eyes refused to focus on anything. I could move my head to stare at the rising sun, but that would interfere with the movement of the RUN. The RUN sapped all my energy, forcing every system in my body to direct its energy into the forward stumbling of my feet. I have never breathed harder than at the end of this run. I wanted to sprint to the end, like most the rest of my run group, but something in my body said it was impossible. Maybe it wasn't, but I didn't have the encouragement to break past that final barrier, that mental block that separates mind from body. I want to know what that feels like, to be free of thought and bask in the purity of exertion.